went to school. as usual. sch was ok at first. but that 2nd co-form of mine very unfair lah! i mean like we had to stay in the quadrangle for silent reading. everyone had to take out their reading materials, readers' digest, storybooks, national geographic and stuff. so i just took out one article to read lah. and the article is school every tues will give de lor. so i took out that one to read. cos i forget bring storybook. then that co-form scold ppl la. so. she scold me. she say what, "you mean you don't have your book?..." oh whatever. it's like. then she ask me stand up sia. me and munirah stood up lah. is like. HELLO. it's so unfair. the rest is reading the same thing and you ask both of us to stand. then after silentn reading go back class i complain to mr jhee. this time i admit i complain. becos i buay songwith my 2nd co-form. k forget. then go back class another da ji. teacher changed our seats lah. it's like. ok. nvm i sit with yucai nvm. but the attitude he gave me sucks. and i was totally hurt. but nobody knew this. seriously. i have no idea. what's the problem with me being his partner? his reaction dun need so big right. i very very angry. i feel like just slapping him. cos it' like. i've nv seen someone so fucking idiotic lah.you don't like me say lah. don't want sit with me who want sit with you sia. go tell teacher you want change. u change can already hor. i'm not getting off. cos it's you can't accept me as ur partner what so you go tell teacher lah. i stay there no prob one. i still got ppl i can talk to. so what if my voice is loud? but pls, i have already promise i won't shout at ppl for nth now. i will just keep quiet. i will just say class stand. i know. many ppl dun like me. but when you people treat me the way like as if i'm a virus, i'm jinx, do you people know how sad and hurt i am?? you people only know know how to disturb me. make me angry. see me only, "i want study lah!" wtf is this? trying to test my patience eh? do it lah. i won't shout at you. i shout at you only make me lose my voice. lose my temper. i don't needa do that ok. i tried to be friednly. but how you treat me? pulling your table away from mine or pushing my table away to the wall? HELLO. i'm a human with feelings ok. with all the fucking ppl beside you ganging up to disturb me. you think very funny is it. why do i even have to cry over you ppl. yes. i cried. but nobody knows that. who cares about me now? i tried to be happy. i tried to make ppl happy. i tried all my ways. still there's fucking ppl saying i curry favour the teachers. HELLO. i said before. I DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT. don't understan english or what. care about yourself first lahh. fucking chao ah beng,. step ah beng nia. think i fucking care whether you ah beng or ah lian or whoever shit ah. pls, i dun fucking care. get away from me if you dun like me. hur. ok. i'm not continuing that. anyway. i was just fucking pissed off by the fucking partner of mine. sorry i dun mean to keep repeating the f word but i seriously is very pissed off. it's really sickening can. first, ppl say i'm not fit to bethe captain of tidalwave, second, ppl calls me complain queen whenever they see me, third, many ppl in my class are against me or rather not only my class. ppl from other classes too. pls can. i seriously is very upset ok. ok forget, anyway. after school, just go home luhh. then like after go home, teng teng called me for lunch. so i say ok lor since i haven't eaten my lunch. haha. she made me laugh today. mabe she knows i'm feeling lousy everyday now. so she's trying to make me happy lah. THANKS TENG!! haha. after that go her house take my earpiece and went home. and now i'm blogging today. haha. oh yes, me and yichun saw this very cute army guy in the bus today. but the pictures of him taken not so nice lehh. so i dun intend to post them. wahaha. bleahs. ok lah. i wanna get a rest. byee. 25 days since it was read; 27 days since it was sent. blogged @ 2:50 PM Tuesday, January 30, 2007 ok i ponned taf today. becos at first thought me and grace going do the class tee thingy. but then at last nv go. cos my class lah. so incooperative. like f-ing what lah. trying to get everyone together to decide on class tee design then they so hack care can. so, mr jhee say. if they dun care, why do we even spend the f-ing time on them? i mean minus the f-ing. i added that becos i'm pissed. haha. okok. anyway. we might not be getting class tee already. ohh whatever. i hate my class spirit. it just suck. i envy ppl with good class, and very united. aw. oh. nvm. anyway. my secret is no longer a secret. many ppl knew about it liao. it's like. even he knows it. and ppl says i'm just too carried away. oh whatever. at my age, like, pls lah. okok. whatever. i'm moving on. i mean. i seriouslyy have no idea, no direction on where i'm going, what i'm doing and what am i waiting for.. i'm wasting my freaking time. oh, on some ppl. ehh. i'm supposed to be just waiting and not saying ath. oh well, nvm. hmm. went macs with grace they all after sch. cos i no where to go. and i didn;t bring my pe teeshirt so didn't go taf lahh. down there talk talk, play play and laugh laugh. hahaha. fun luh with them. feel so relaxed. i mean though i feel extra but then. they still talk to me. :) ok lah.gtg. byebye. tc. :) oh. get my mind off luh. it's driving me crazy. everytime think of you. think of the days we had. aww. making me feel as if i'm so useless. blogged @ 7:31 PM Monday, January 29, 2007 today? hmm. went to school on dad's pickup. wahh. today got 7 absentees.. aww. so sad. nvm. today was quite ok.. there's no teasing or anything today.. i mean at least for me.. at the moment. hmm. puaysee msged me this morning.. telling me that she have told him i like him. i was shock.. i was thinking how am i gonna face him when i see him one day? am i just gonna walk off like that? or what? i seriously have no idea.and why am i always talking about him these days? i dun wanna think about him. i mean. oh whatever. went tm with teng teng today. and her friends. omg. sorry to say that, i don;t like them.. i mean the two guys or maybe just the very resort-to-violence guy. he very judge ppl by the looks lor.. i was staring at him lah. when he say that the gal so ugly dun talk to her lah. let's go. and pls lah. ppl good looking or not so good looking your prob mehh. who are you to decide their looks and comment. if you have such unpleasant commets, i suggest you keep them to yourself. had fun. but. teng teng know i wasn't really happy luh. becos. oh whatever. ppl should know if they have read my previous posts.. maybe i shall wat.. just a little longer.. for that answer. if he says, no. i will evetually give up. really. i promise you ppl ok. i'm carrying on with my life. i'm gonna make myself happy and smiling again.. truthfully. i promise i wouldn't lie and fake my smiles ok? ppl, don't worry about me. i'm alright. i think i shall end here. bye. blogged @ 9:25 PM Sunday, January 28, 2007 i'm strong and i'm sure i'll be.. i'll fight wars. defend myself from all weapons and all evil thoughts against me.. ok. i dunno why i'm posting all these. i'm supposed to be emo. haha. actually. yes, i'm supposed to be emo. but it's just at night. i mean. in the day i'm still ok.. but i think and think.. nvm. anyway. went xinhui's house to get my class tee design.. then walked home... used the comp.. after hrs on the comp.. didn't much. just looking at the same blogs, same posts and stuff.. i check who's online as usual.. wanting to see him online lah.. then yes, i saw him online as busy again.. suddenly many thoughts ran into my mind.. what am i thinking again? i have no idea.. i msged teng, puaysee and sansan. and of course chitmin.. teng, puaysee and san knows i couldn't let go. i mean.. yes, it seems so easy for me to forget kayan. i'm ready to put the name because i long got over him. but how many ppl knew that i teared for him when i knew i had to let go? not many right? now, asking me to get over HIM, is not easy. i haven't teared for him yet i think i mean. i couldn't be certain. i'm indecisive. i can't make my decision on whether to let him go or continue to wait.. chitmin told me to get over him. nmove on. i'll find a better one.. i know.. but. he knows even better that it's so not easy to let go just by a wink, a flip or whatever. some told me to let go. some told me that i shouldn't i should wait for him. wait for his answer. how long have i waited? i'm tired. but maybe still, in people's eyes, i'm that bubbly, cheerful, always smiling girl.. who knows what i really am thinking? ppl who knew me from head to toe, know that i'm upset in me. ppl who dunno me well, thinks i'm normal, i'm happy in and out. i knew it myself. i knew better than anyone that i'm unhappy. ppl say, why make yourself so unhappy over him. do you think it's worth it? no i don;t think so. yes, at least that's what on my mind. but when you loved someone, you will get how i'm feeling right now. oh. i'm so fake. i can't really act as if nth have happened infront of anybody. maybe some. and i can't really act as if i'm happy. if i'm unhappy, my mind will be full of thoughts. i will just sit at a corner thinking again. why do i always have to be unhappy over things like that? ain't i supposed to be happier than what people think i already am? twice now, that i have dreamt about him. both with other gals. one kissing another girl, one tagging another gal's blog and saying the 3 words. was that fate? i mean. what makes me so thinking of him? was that fate that i see you all the time when i hope i don't see you? and hoping so much you don't notice me in somewhere? i don't want you to see me, to notice me, because i dun want you to see a lousy side of me. i know you have seen it. i dun want you to see it again.. it's saddening. it really is. what can i do when i see you and hoping so much to msg you? but i didn't anyway. i walked quickly. hoping you don't even get a glimpse of my backview. i don't wanna appear so weak in front of you.. let me be strong ok? at least in front of you? i cant afford to see my side in the mirror. i hate smiling when i'm crying inside. what more do you want? i like you. that's all. i nv got a reply. nv. i want everything to be as normal as it could be. i know i couldn't turn time back. i just can't. though i wished it will. there are many ppl who care and love me, why do i have to freaking care about you? why do i have to even face you? i thought i won't fall for you. because we were good friends. and that i told you almost everything.. i just wondered. i know zhenxing longer than you. but why didn't i fell for him instead? i knew him too. but i just fell for you in the end. was that destiny also? i have no idea. first, god made us knew each other, became friends, became good friends. what's next? ppl ask me why i got so emo because of you. why? i have no idea either. i looked through your msges again and again.. wishing one day you would msg me. give me an answer.. but until now, i didn't.. sometimes i didn't even get a reply from you.. what's all these?? can anybody tell me? anybody who is reading this post? i'm tired. i seriously am tired. i dun see the point of continuing this post. i'm ending it here.. bye. blogged @ 10:22 PM well.. what i dreamt about last night was totally to my surprise lahh. and of course i was really sad lah. this is what happens. i was using the comp, blogging, looking at blogs and stuff. so i went into jer's blog.. i went to her tagboard. but actually i went her blog becos i was just curious if HE tagged or have a blog or sth. so, i saw his tag in jer's blog.. and here's what the tag is about, "waaa... ," then dunno what... "i.. love you.." and this was what he tagged.. i mean. i seriously have no idea why is this so.. i replied the tag,i mean since it's not replied yet. and of course i used my own name. "so, HE*[the name] likes jerlisa huh." jer replied, "no lah. he joking only lah." HE* replied. "no lah. i not joking. i where got joke. i like jer." and stuff like that. he tagged alot of stuff. then i read already i very sad lah. so i was thinking.. why when i sent you that email, you didn't tell me you like her. you didn't even give me an answer.. and now, you told her you like her.. what's your problem? what's the problem with me? i waited and waited for your answer. this is what i get back? this is. oh whatever. since. you like her then. well, suit you. i'm not thinking of you. i'm not caring. oh. whatever. and i was even thinking. that i'm lacking sth. well, nvm. but seriously, the dream seems so real.. i rushed out to see her blog once i woke up just now.. i haven't even brushed my teeth.. can you see, now? i mean. how i'm feeling? and her freaking blog doesn't work.. all the time... maybe god is playing with me. he's playing with me, her blog is playing with me, internet surfer is playing with me,everyone's playing with me. what's the problem? what's the problem with falling in love with your bestfriend? i mean. no problem right? then why people are treating me like that? it's really saddening lah. i just hate to face the fact that i actually fell in love with you. OMG. give me a break.. i seriously hate the fact that i'm here, i'm just here. and yesterday i was reading one of the stories from the dear kelly coloum of teenage mag. so i was reading this article about this girl having to choose one guy out of two. one is a sec4 guy, and one is her ex. she had feeling for the sec4. and after she and her ex broke up, they became bro-sis relationship. but this girl developed feelings for her ex as well as the sec4. she asked dear kelly what to do. she was given an advise, "choose none of them. none of them is right for you.. ... you knew the sec4 isn't gonna choose you. becos he's graduating or rather he didn't even take notice of you. for your ex, just remain that bro-sis relationship and be good friends forever....." i mean it's sth like that. not exactly quoted. then suddenly, i thought, mabe it's really just too early for me to be talking about these. shall i just let him go and continue this bro-sis, good friend relation? it made me think hard.. really hard.. i msged puaysee.. and i asked her... should i let him go? and stuff. but anyway.. i will have to make a decision one day.. i couldn't be here lying to myself time and time again.. i seriously have no idea. i'm at a total losing end. i can't make myslef walk any further in this path at this age.. i can't. i seriously can't.. i'm making myself numb.. making myself nv to think about him.. i know it's harder than i think.. i will try.. i must get him out of my mind... and oh yes. i dreamt about me, attending some stuff and president is attending also. haha. great huh. but sth wired is, the stairs very irritating one lahh. it's like wth. i dunno how to describe lah. then dunno what tidalwave and stuff. arghh. can't remember. haha. ok ah. i shall update further later. byebye. blogged @ 9:18 AM Saturday, January 27, 2007 gb today... was.. ok at first.. then still. ok lah. it's like. i've been tolerant ok. i don't wish to create trouble anything. they walked past me, they shout, "COMPLAIN QUEEN!!" it's like wtf. ok. first time nvm. i tolerate. second time, i shouted back at them. i was making myself not to shout the f word infront everybody, my sec1s, my officers, my fellow gals. cos i promised m'ams and ms ho to give a good impression. and though i kinda scolded one sec1 today. i told her she's very rude to her seniors who are us. the way she call us to do sth, like, "eh, come here come here. help do [[this and this..]]" pls can. i can't tolerate rudeness to the elderly lah. i mean ppl who are older than you. ok anyway. i made myself not to shout any vulgarity. so i just said they very hold grudges lah. and i shouted i didn't do ath. i only told mr yeo how i feel. then they think i complian. eh. then m'am still apologised to them can. it's like, why do they have to be apologised when we didn't do ath wrong? pls, they started it first. i don't wanna create trouble. and make things bigger. it's like. okok. my fault. everything my fault. talk to teacher also they think i complain, just becos teacehr confronted them. ok. whatever. they hold grudges ok. i told ms ho i wanna let the matter go. i dun wanna pursue the matter. it's sickening. but anyway. today's drills sucks. i mean cos.. there's still no 90 degrees from the gals. but ok lah. at least they tried. nvm. today give out the prize for last week's cheer comp. then then then, my group, took all the goodies. and gave me just one timeout. hurr. and we got first for that. haha. thanks to our voices. wahaha. BOOSTERS rocks! =D hahaha. after gb, we had to clear up. i mean my squat had to clear up the mess. then me and xinhui went tm walk here and there. haha. actually we nth to do one lah. haha. then after that took 67 home. when walking the path home, saw teng with her mum and her sis. going tampines also. haha. went home, asked xinhui to help me draw the teachers for my class tee. wahahah. and one thing is, she nv see my teachers before. haha. and what she drew was really cute. haha. i haven't seen her work yet. but i saw the mr jhee in the picture. aww! so cute! haha. must colour it still. sian. maybe i shall ask others to colour it. haha. credits to xinhui! whee~ haha. hmm. went tuition after that. tuition was fun luh. with sansan, sheauyun and iris. and i brought a packet of sweets. they were eating and throwing me the wrappers. hur! got like that one mehh. treat them eat sweets still must help them throw wrapper. haiyur. then sansan was exploring my phone lah. then she sawe the picture. i mean one picture i edited lah. afew days ago.. i didn't remember editing it until sansan showed me that picture. omg. and she kept asking me luh. omg. so paiseh lah. but she still promised to keep her mouth zipped. then a last sheau yun also zhi dao le. they down there make fun of him.. say he gorilla. -.- it's like. hello got so kua zhang mehh. haiyur. then i kept saying sansan and him will cha chu huo hua one.. one day they might just be together. haha. oops. sansan's not gonna kill me right?!! ahahaa she love me too much to bear to kll me. wahahaha. bleahs. bhb. lalala. wahh. my secret bei jie chuan le lah. i mean it's like. it was meant to be a crush. =x oops. ok. i'm just talking rubbish. oh whatever. sansan talk alot of rubbish luh. lalala. okok. later she say i.. nvm. but she won't lah. she just won't. haha. ok lah. i stop here le. bye. =D i suddenly remembered the days.. the days.. you sent me home.. the days.. you went bedok cc with me then dinner together.. the days.. we went out as a big group.. the days.. we took many photographs.. the days.. that you came all the way to my block, just to pass me my birthday present.. do you still remember? the days.. we spent your 14th birthday with you.. the days.. i went to your church.. i held your hand tightly.. many people thought we were one.. but they never knew, i wished we were.. did you forget? that. i liked you? or. you pretended you never knew? i miss you; blogged @ 6:38 PM Friday, January 26, 2007 hmm. went to school. YES AS USUAL. haha. hmm. nth much to blog about lah. just that sth really terrible happened in my class today. this is what happenss.... we were supposed to hand in our history essays today to mdm fina. and must be approved lah. so like all of us handed in our essays. all approved. but 3 wasn't approved. reason is, : too short, essay untidily done. 2 of them, A and B gave attitude lah. one of them talk back to teacher. cos his essay was like, machiam lyrics lah. so is like, very untidy. then teacher scold him. he still say, "is there a problem?" teacher more angry, "is there a problem?!! you ask me is there a problem?!!" A say, " i don't think there's any problem with that." teacher shouted at him. i forgot what she shouted. but nvm. then, mdm fina continued to give her notes to us. wanting us to file in. then becos A and B is sitting together then infront of teacher. as in first row. so teacher passed down the notes expecting all of us to pass down the row. then they still angry that teacher scold them what. so they give attitude dun wanna pass down the row. but at last B still passed down the row lah. then we were asked to file them into the file. at first they dun want file in one. but B still filed them in eventually. but A was very defiend and stubborn lah. then teacher say, "FILE IT IN!! NOW!!",[still no response..] "NOW!!" again, there's no response. so mdm fina decided, "GET OUT OF MY CLASS!! GET OUT NOW!! [but before she could finish her sentence, [he slammed the table and walk out of class." mdm fina continued, "sit outside but dun disappear..." [he already walked out and walked off.] mdm fina walked outside, "COME BACK!" but still he didn't come back. mdm fina went to the office. came back.. after awhile, mr rosman came in. talked to mdm fina and stuff. then during chemistry lesson, before we start test, mrs tan came and asked chair to bring A's bag to the office. woah. that was close. the end of my story. xD went home after school. i mean after passing yichun the leadership conference form. i went home taking 87. then saw tianloke lah. he was like, "eh pamela! where's my bday present??" then i reply, "soon soon. later i go buy.." then he say, "i want bag ah. i want the small zinc sling bag ahh." i was like. "wahh. i no money lahs. hur." but i still promised to get him one when i have saved enough money. i msged eric. then he nv reply. then nvm lor. reached home, changed, took 69 to tampines. i was soo hoping not to see him. at the next stop, he boarded the bus. he went to the upperdeck, no seats, went downstairs. phew. for further details of the seeing him part, refer to the post below... but anyway, i was just running away from him.. but nvm lah. he doesn't know that anyway. went bedok inter to meet mum to buy clothes.. was chatting with chitmin on the phone telling him about my probs like seeing *him* and stuff. but hanged up when i see mum. i say i will chat with him when i reach home on msn lah. haiyoh. after diner, went to buy my clothes. aww. ok. buy finish liao. went ntuc for groceries. and went home after that. here i am blogging now.wahh. chit is not online! argh. nvm. shall wait for him to come online. haha. chatting with him is cool. haha. i can't believe i'm chatting with him. i mean just now. ok lahh. gtg. tired luh. byebye. don't run away from reality will you? yes i did. becos i'm afraid to face you.. i really am.. yes, i admit i wished to see you all the time.. but. i'm also afraid to see you face to face. it makes me sad. and nervous and embarrass.. give me a chance... blogged @ 8:05 PM i seriously dunno if all that was fated.. first, everytime when i dun wish to see him. i eventually will see him. why? i mean. when i dun feel like seeing certain people, they won't appear before me. but yet, it doesn't happen with him. it just don't. it's dunno how many times. that i wished i won't see him.. but i did. why is that so?? i seriously have no idea. i saw him again. i was in 69 on my way to tampines. just at that moment at another stop after i got on the bus, he went up the bus with his friend. went to the upper deck where i was, but lucky there's no space so they went down again to the lower deck.. i wanted so much to msg him. but i remembered he didn't reply me, so i decided not to send a msg to him. when upper deck was like got seats already, i wanted so much to msg him and tell him that there's seats on the upperdeck.. but. i didn't eventually. cos. i dunno. i'm just afraid seeing him.. it's the first time of this year that i see him. excited but disappointed plus dun feel like seeing him.. the feeling sucks. and i'm just afraid of the awkwardness we have within. or maybe just me.. i wished all that was just a dream. but it's just not. i really saw him. i walked as fast as i did. hoping he won't see me. well, i guess he didn't eventually.. i didn't think of him so much. but after i saw him, he's just on my mind again. why?? why must i see him? i know i can't hde from him forever.. i know it's just impossible to hide and not letting him see me forever.. but i can't help it... i can perhaps. but i just dun want him to see me... it's really embarrassing. at least that's what i think.. ok. i seriously dun expect things to turn out this way. it's too much of a surprise. i have no direction. i turn to no where. i turn to no one. maybe.. it's i who just don't have the guts to face him, to face reality. i'm obviously running away from it and from from him. it's is seriously the time for me to do a reflection on myself. whether i' really into this stuff.. i will conitnue later. byebye. blogged @ 3:34 PM Thursday, January 25, 2007 hmm. went to school. haiyur. everyday i go to school. but there's no diff lah. haa. eh! i was watching let it shine. and i find the story very cute lahh. and i have always loved putting myself into ppl who are on dramas shoes lahh. i mean imagining myself with my friends having the scenario lahh. omg. here i go again. bleahs. anyway. had pe today. so we played some "improvised" softball. ok that's what mr ganesan said. haha. had alot of fun playing lah. haha. run here run there. like small kids lahh. haha. after pe, we went back to class for maths lesson.. so like that lah. aww. i have the freaking history essay to do. and i have to complete the class tee design by tmr.. and hand in to grace tmr. wth. and es, i have my tuition hw to do, i have my roll call thingy to do for sat. ohh. so many things. hurr.. lalala. bleahs. ok anyway.. had AGM for sec1s, 4s and 5s. and yes, the "bo mia[no name]" is in tidalwave lah. then he keep suaning me. arghh. paiseh lah. but nvm. haha. i thought he in solarpower. cos i realise many cute guys in solarpower lah. ahha. bleahs. nvm. after AGM, went to look for suling they all at the study area. we slacked there. but not really lahh. i ask suling help me with the drawing with the class tee.. just ppl nia. haha. was about to go to the ava room for event management. so i was with my fellow house leaders lah. i meant rather than with my gb gals. ahha. anyway. they are kinda unfriendly to me this days. went to m'am's office again to give her the two leadership conference forms. then i went home after that. aww. tmr got phy ad chem test. wth. why i got so many things to do yet so little? nvm. forget it. wah! cny coming. but my clothing haven't buy finish lah. but. nvm lah. ok lah. gtg soon. have to do my hw and study for tests already. and of course think of some people. xDDD ahaha. no lah. gtg. byebye. blogged @ 8:01 PM Wednesday, January 24, 2007 hurr. ok. school was ok. but very jialat lahh. first period is humanities. so mdm fina came in to our class. but there's only one period of her lesson. then. she wanna collect essay. wtf! she tore everybody's paper lah. including mine duhh. then i already. like those ppl whose papers were tore already leh. then i ok. i keep quiet. i still can accept lah. if last time i already cry liao. ok anyway. the day went on. oh yes. today's assembly seem to be damn low lahh. i mean the time. i fell asleep in class during silent reading. then mrs tay hit me with paper. grrr. then i wake up lahh. still like waiting for time to pass! wth. then soon. recess. i was still quiet. and i dun intend to tell wanjing they all my paper kena tear. cos i know they willjust say, "haiyah. it's like this one lah. no big deal lah. nvm lah. tear tear lah." i hate those response lor. and that's what i got during recess. wtf. nvm. forget it. after sch, i went home with sophia. she came my house. then after awhile i pei teng teng go eat lunch. so, aaron was there. wahlao. still as quiet. haiyoh! hahaha. nvm. we went hawker centreto eat lah. aaron dun wanna eat. cos he say recess got eat. -.- and what's morehe no money. haha. wahh! aaron hor. now also zhang da le sia. in fact most guys grow up already. weihan too. eric, kayan. zhenxing. awww. ok nvm. haha. after that, we go ynps fetch aaron's didi home. then me and teng sent them to bus stop and pei them wait for bus. lalala. we talked about our past in student care and stuff. aww soo sweet. after aaron and his didi have gone up the bus, me and teng sat down on a bench to have a chat lah. so we chat about love and stuff. ok. common topic.. then i thought of him again. wahlao. everytime also i xiang him one lor. omg. nvm. ehh. i dunno how to design class tee lah! omg. fizah help me!!! arghh. yey! i change my blog song again. zhen xin hua by dunn who. i kinda find this song meaningful lah. haha. ok lah. i stop here for today.. byee. blogged @ 8:54 PM Tuesday, January 23, 2007 went to school as usual. arghh. needa start designing for class tee. but i seriously dunno how to lahh. so i told grace and hafizah that we shall do it together. haha. BRAINSTORMING TIME!! hahaha. okok. anyways. nth much. went phy lab for physics today. my seat was beside grace lah. haha. cool. finally got someone to talk to even if it's just afew periods lah. hmm. had assembly today. but it's just briefing about AGM '07. AGM equals Annual General Meeting. it's for the house system and stuff. paiseh lahh. cos i tidalwave captain. then alot of tidalwave ppl dun like me. so they were like booing me can. very lak seh one lor. ok this word was thought by mr lea. hahaha. i kinda scared lah! cos today only got sec2s and 3s. this thursday got sec1s, 4s and 5s lah. wth. i hope they won't jeer at me now. haha. hmm. after AGM, i went to 3E to look for sophia they all. then they all kena lecturing. haha. omg. nvm. wahlao. now, i think i will hate my poa teacher lahh. she's so... f-ing irritating luhh. had taf today. boring boring. haha. ok nvm. hmm. ok. i was so absent minded today. i told m'am i will be going her office after school. i was ready to go already lor. i mean like when i'm leaving sch i told her i'm leaving for her office. then when i alight from 87, i totally forgot about it. so i went on to bye bread and took 225 home. so when i alighted at my bus stop and crossing the road, suddenly, i remembered i forgot to go find m'am. so i ran back to take the bus back to inter. then i rushed down to m'am's office to pass her the leadership conference form. haha. woah. how absent minded am i. =x went home after that, and here i am blogging here. haha. k lah. gtg. bye. blogged @ 8:12 PM Monday, January 22, 2007 i don't know if this will be an emo post. perhaps it's for him. but i just know he won't read this. so i guess. it doesn't matter what i write for him, for his eyes. i'm afraid to let him know i like him. i used to be confused over two guys. whom are both my bestfriends, and gors. but now, i know who i truly like. seriously, i do. i don't confess, i don't tell you i like you. you should know. mostly because i'm afraid you will end up like that guy.. avoiding me and stuff. you told me you won't. i sent you the email.. telling you i think that.. you like me.. maybe, i was abit rush that i said something like that to you. i told you i wanted an answer.. but you never intended to give me that answer.. you cared for me. and i know that. maybe your care towards me.. is just a gor to a mei relationship.. it's just my wishful thinking.. i don't know. maybe you have things you won't wanna say. 'cos.. i just don't know how to talk to you.. i msged you.. i told you i just feel like msging you.. and your reply was just a simple oh okay. you know what. my inbox now.. have 348 msges.. all from you. some i have accidently deleted.. and from when did i start keeping? from 02 dec 06. i read through your msges again and again.. thinking if you keep my msges.. thinking that.. why should you keep my msges? i'm not anybody special to you. i'm just a friend. or maybe lesser than a friend.. i don't know what i should do. i'm just waiting and waiting and waiting. i don't know how many 10 years i'm able to wait. i miss you; i wanna be with you.. i just feel like telling you that i miss you. but i can't.. i know you won't reply. i don't know how you will reply. at most, "i don't know how to reply" or "dot dot dot". what else will you reply?? you told others that i like him. but you know what. the one like is you. you know that?? he reads my blog.. you don't.. he knows what's going on when i like him. and he avoided me.. i hope when you know that i like you, you won't avoid me.. but i may be the one avoiding you.. i don't know.. i don't know how to face it. i don't know how to face you. i trouble over you. all the time.. i got emotional all the time.. most of the time, becos of you.. becos i think about you. i just think i should just keep my feelings to myself.. like everyone does, friends,we are just friends. i will keep that distance. i will not cross the line. good friends will always remain as good friends.. i know my limits.. what i mean is, i will just remain silent. i will not say i like you. let my words remain unsaid.. blogged @ 8:02 PM school was fine today. mr jhee wanna get a class tee. awww. i'm looking forward to that though. haha. hmm. nth much to blog about lah. today just have nth special to blog about lehh. ohh. today's post is soo short.. know what. today in school, i was doing my work, paying attention to teacher, i thought about him again. ok it just came naturally lahh. even this afternoon when i'm having a nap, ahh. i think of him. eh wahlao. why i never think of him, he's just appearing in my mind... and stuff. i dunno lahh. it will be. just deceiving myself if i say he's just a goodfriend of mine. i mean yes he is, and i dunno why i ri jiu shen qing for him lah. i mean, after like i know him for so long, omg. why am i telling you ppl this kinda thing. ok. i stop here. HAHA. oh yes! you know where i get the inspired memories for my new url from? from TAN WEITENG. i tell her i want change my url. but then i have no inspiration so she told me this inspiration memories. so i decided to use inspired memories. this is my story of my new url. wahaa. haha. THANKS TENG!!! =DDD i'm definitely lying to myself if i say tht you're only my friend.. why do i do that? becos i like you.. blogged @ 6:32 PM Sunday, January 21, 2007 ok. i really feel like msging him luhh. he this few days very seldom online lahhh. or rather i very very seldom see him online. then i feel like msging him. but then i at last still never msg him. haiyur. crap. i miss him. i do ok. i'm thinking about him.. x( sad luh. Tears are the silent lullabies that carry you to sleep; Heartaches that your heart just couldn't keep. Falling for him once: temptation falling for him twice: destiny getting your heart broken: a mistake letting it happen again: unstoppable FOR ONE LITTLE SECOND, I SAW THAT SPARKLE IN YOUR EYES, TELLING ME THAT YOU WERE TRULY SORRY. you've had the greatest person in the world right in front of you, and you couldn't do anything about it, so you're heartbroken, and you're left alone just thinking about them. You were never supposed to mean this much to me. I was finally getting over you.. I even had crushes other than you.. I was walking with my head up, thinking I wasn't gonna fall.. then you had to talk to me again... It’s pretty sad how after all those tears; all the late night fights; & your little games, you still have this incredible way of winning me over with just one glance I really missed you tonight. I miss talking to you, knowing that you get me. And every time I talk to someone else it just reminds me of how much they don't. I’m so tired of pretending everything’s okay my tears are starting to show & my smile is slowly fading away. You’re not anyone special to me.. you’re just a guy.. so don't lead me on especially if its a lie so leave me alone like you’ve always done.. because you have hurt me. [[too much to be the right one.]] And even though now we're just friends i still wish for us to be close like we were... i wish you would hug me i wish you would ask "what's wrong" when you see that i'm sad i wish you would walk with me instead of just walking by me People think that if you love somebody hard enough then everything is just gonna work out. People are wrong. you told me that you'd always be there for me through thick and thin, you told me to keep my head held high, you told me that i would always be loved by you but you left for her, my head fell in shame, and now you love her. blogged @ 8:07 PM ok. i was home the whole day. spent most my time sleeping. HAHA. it's like i wake up already i went back to sleep. haha. hmm. i was thinking of somebody lahh. for the whole of last night. and even now lahh. and oh yes. there's once i dreamt about seeing him and ac, kissing in front of the traffi light. they were like. in their bg uniform, standing infront of red swastica, seems that he's sending her home, they kissed while waiting for the traffic to turn green man. they kissed. and they saw me. standing opposite the traffic. they were shocked i guess. i stuned and ran home after that. well... i'm afraid lah. afraid that one day it really happens to me. and i seriously can't imagine how i will react and how i'll face it.. ok nvm. i'm just thinking too much. if i see, then see lor. i can't do ath too.. time goes on. life goes on. i'm ready for that. arghh. enough of that. i must continue my hw soon. i have like my history workbook to do, maths assignment, phy reading assignment ad stuff. ther's so many things to do. ok. at least that's what i think. ok lah. i shall end here. i'll continue later. byee. blogged @ 3:56 PM Saturday, January 20, 2007 hmm. i went gb today lah. wahlao.. so sian can. nvm anyway. i was supposed to wake up at 0630. but mum thought it's gor who asked her to wake him up so mum kept waking him up instead of me. i was like. wth. the msg is i send one lahs! haiyoh. then gorgor bai bai tio meh. haha. bathed, ate breakfast, packed bag, take allmy stuff, sit dad's pick up to school. i waited in school for like.. 20 min or so. cos i reached sch at around 0734. s i was sitting there... stoning.. waiting.. thinking. hahaa. there were 15 gals who came today. but i seriously hated the sec1s gals this year. i mean. ok hate is not the word. it's just not the word. but it sounds just right and better. the sec1s are freaking noisy lah,.keep pl;aying with the balloons and stuff. irritating lah. i was giving a face for almost the whole day cos i simply hated the way i was treated. the rest of the senior gals have things to do and explain and stuff but i'm just there alone lahh. i say what also they disagree. ok lah. i just keep my mouth shut. we had games, cheer comp and stuff. cheer comp was ok lahh. all the groups had their creativity.. yeps. refreshment was alright too. but i find that the sec1s are really rude. abnd they treated us like their maids. what did they do? ok. we serve them, that's what we should do. there's this gal, she wanted me to refill her dessert, but she didn't ask, "can you help me to refill my almond longan pls?" instead, "eh. help me refill [and pushing the bowl to me.]" is that acceptable? HELLO. all of us are not their maids or servants. in fact, we are your seniors and you should only right respect us. we respect you. so we hope you respect us as your seniors. after everything, had vesper. and a short briefing after that. cleared up the place and went home.. i went home and used the comp.. rested for an hr. went to tuition after that. aww. today's lesson is fast! hur. nvm. i shall catch up. went home to meet ber. cos i going out with her.. we were both happy lah. i mean in the first place. we were talking about.. you know who.. and stuff. haha. well. she said i'm in love. which is what i dun really believe i am.. and why would i be?? i dun understand.. but whatever i do.. i just think of *him* lah.. like.. i do hw, i think of *him*. i bored i think of *him*. i feel like smsing someone, i think of *him*. i wanna see *him* online and stuff.. aww.. do you guys think i am? omg. i can't imagine myself doing such things... even now i'm thinking of him.. saw his cellgroup just now at inter.. i just hoped to see him. or rather dun see him.. i thought about that time holding his hands.. for the first time.. omg. that's sweet. but wrong place.. -.- aww. if only all that could be real.. and not just worshiping god. i mean. to hold his hands... arghh. what am i thinking.. i just feel like msging him. but i dun think i should. cos. i dun wanna disturb him.. my wild imagination.. seem so.. oh whatever. I MISS HIM LUHH. arghh. ok anyway. ber cried becos of nic again.. i dun get why nic just can't understand ber.. she like can't have time of her own with her friends.. i hope i dun get guys like him next time... anyway. we went marina square.. and it reminds me of kayan. omg. recall recall. whatever lah. hmm. i'm sooo tired.. i'm going turn in soon.. i just hope ber is gonna get home fast and stuff. i'm afraid nic will do sth silly lahh!! omg. sounds soo dramtic. nvm. forget.. i really dunno how to err. help.. cos i seriously have no idea on this kinda stuff. but i know it feels just bad lah. arghh. went home at around 10 plus. reached home not long ago.. about. an hr ago lor.. sian-ed. ok lah. i wanna sleep already.. byebye. nights. I MISS HIM luhh. blogged @ 11:56 PM Friday, January 19, 2007 school today was alright. i mean as usual lahh. but good leh. i mean my class now very shao disturb me le. and i no longer cry. i mean like. this week. i hope ppl will get that "complains" mind out of their mind and stop thinking i complain to teachers. hur. oh yes. i'm just back from meet-the-parents session.. aww it's.. boring. -.- anyway. today the chinese gals in my class, wore slippers to school. not all lah. some nia. they kena caught then punishment is to be barefooted for the whole day. haiyah dun care lah. i dun understand why though. nvm. hmm. wahlao. today alot of things lahh. i finished sch at 1200. went to look for mrs foo to hand up the assignments. i called her extension but she wasn't in the office. so i just left them in he pigeon hole. i left sch at around 1215. yes. alone. cos wanjing they all went off first. then like i reached home at around 1245? so like. i used the comp and stuff. bathed at 1300. cos like i have to leave for meeting at 1400. i left the house at around 1340. the freaking bus came like at 1450 lah. lucky i wasn't late. in fact, the rest were late. we were supposed to meet m'am hweleng and m'am jasmine for discussion for tmr's prog. cos tmr will be sort of a big prog lahh. then i thought i would be late. but i wasn't i was just on time. i reached there exactly at 1400. wahahah. bleahs. had my lunch and stuff. so wait for the rest. they came at like 1445 or what lahh. they were super late lahh. nvm. hur. discussed about stuff like the games, the food and blah blah blah. went to get the gifts and the tidbits lah.m'am jasmine, huiyi and me. we went giant first. then went ntuc. so we bougtht quite alot lahh. went to m'am's office to wrap the gifts up. i brought everything home. -.- and i took a cab home. i mean of course using m'am's money. as in. she's asked me to take a cab home. cos i needa attend meet the parents session. i rushed home bathed and get out of my house to meet my gor. i did everything in.. 15 min time. i mean within 15 min, or even less than that, i finised bathing, changing, and doing whatever stuff. and yes. my gor accompaned me to the meet the parents session. he said it was BORING. you know why? becos my principal sucks. she just read from the slides. and just elaborate a little. my gor say she might not have even seen the slides before lah.. hur. i dozed off alittle. oops. i was all the way infront lah. and hall is really not a nice place.esp my school hall. it's so damn freaking stuffy and hot lahh. wahlao. wanjing, shihui they all all nv bring their parents lah. hur.nvm. they are two ppl who thinks these talks ain't important. oh whatever. tmr still must go school lor. sian-ed. tmr welcome party for the sec1s. i hope i dun have to scold them on the first day.... ahhh.. i dun look forward to this thing. i look forward to the food! WAHAHA. bleahs.. okok. that's bloody lame. nvm. gtg. byee. lalala. xDD blogged @ 9:54 PM Thursday, January 18, 2007 more and more things is piling up now. first, i got my gb stuff to handle. i have to lead the sec1s or whatever. second, i got new post in tidalwave house commitee which is the house captain. third, i got this year's cip to plan. fourth, i got my own assignments to do. aww.. so sad. nvm. i will cope well with it. :) hmm. went to school as per normal. then today sing anthem twice again. wtf. everytime also must sing at least twice one. cios principal buay song. ask ask sing again. if not, she love our voices too much. that too bad she can only hear it once. so, she decided to ask us to sing again, HAHAHA. okok. that's lame. oh yes. i saw zhenxing in the morning. he's super early today. wah. randy chabot sch! cos they just came back from their sec3 camp. it's like so early can. hurr. anyway. he looked super tired can. haha. haiyohh. then zhenxing talk also not clear lah. hurr. woah. i so tired sia. it's like i everytime bring so many books to sch sia. all my books all so heavy one. and pls, dun ask me to put under the desk [though i feel like putting them.. but thinking that they might get stolen by some idiots, i decided to bring them to and fro. =D] today got poa test. arghh! i frogto the thing already lor. i might get low marks this time. hur. today i got the house option thingy. i mean i needa help to key in whatever details lah. just click click can liao..HAHA. wahlao. i owe mr beh drink sia. cos i bet with him. then he soo sure he's gonna win. hurr. then he won lah. hur. but not really leh! cos all the house committee and teachers all go his lab lor! but then he still won anyway. hur. nvm. just a drink. ahha. okok. anyway. i did the house option forms together with my fellow committee members. went for that calendar planning thing after that.. then had discussions and stuff.. went home with sophia after that lahh.. but then i took 225 along at inter. cos sophia alighted at the 547 there. so i just took 225 white plate alone lor. then i saw gorgor so we go home together lah. gorgor last night nv come home lor. he super tired one. cos hegot night duty. ahh. came home for dinner. and stuff. and now, i'm here blogging. oh yes,. i didn't go taf today. cos of the programmes. ahh. ok lah. i gtg. bye. i got hw and stuff to do. but i want watch tvee first lah.. haha. ok. byee. and oh yes oh yes. tmr is sec3s meet the parents session lor. wtf. mummy cannot go, papa won't understand wha teacher talking one. then da gorgor want go swiming. xiao gorgor dunno want pei me go not.. AHH. nvm lah. i go alone lor.. hais. sian-ed.. ok lah. realy gtg. byebye. blogged @ 6:06 PM Wednesday, January 17, 2007 i went to school as usual.. sat the 0642 bus today. then reach inter saw yichun then took the 0654hrs 87 to sch together.. hmm. nowadays, i mean like this two days, sch was satisfied.. cos nobody really tease me or make fun of me or whatever.. i guess they are just tired lah. i mean tired of disturbing me? i hope so lah. i in class very quiet one. i mean now lah. i used to be one of the noisiest in class 2G. but now, i'm kinda quiet lah. i mean becos there ain't really anybody to talk to. oh yes. me and huiyi ok already. i dunno why also. haha. so yah lah. i'm glad. in fact, i seriously can learnt better if i sit with someone quiet. and i can understand better if i keep my mouth shut in class. hmm. so far still can lah everything. now, i'll take any comments in. i mean if it's good lahh. it's comments which are insulting, i promise, i won't be affected. i'm throwing away all the bad comments and make myself happier with all the good comments. i shall promise my friends, that i will be a better person. i won't shout whatever now. i will not make you all think i complain to teachers agan. but i just wanna say that. yes, i do complain alot. i admit it. but there's sth that i dun get it. it's when i talk to teachers about what happened to me, ppl think i complained to teachers. i mean just becos teacher pointed them out.. i really have no intentions in complaining to teachers about who and who. i just want someone to talk to. i dun understand why. and what makes you ppl think i complained. i have no intentions in wanting anybody to be in trouble.. i just wanna say. i'm close to teachers. i get along well with them. i dun act or favour teachers. cos i dun have to. i dun see the need to. i mean. i just like talking to teachers. they are nice ppl i can talk to.. i mean just joking around and just greeting them. maybe.. many things you ppl thought i complained to teachers and that makes teachers point out at you and stuff. but i didn't. i really didn't. anyway, school was just alright. i had meeting with my gb gals today, i mean huiying, peiting, jinghan and huiyi lah. we were discussing about the games for this week. and stuff. i left sch with, shane, sophia and huiyi at around... 3 plus lah.. WAHH! SHANE'S HAIR IS FUNNY!! but ok ah. it's just out of shape.. =x haha. hmm. went to take 87 together. so at bus stop saw jinhui. then we started chatting with him lah. he obviously took 87 also. hahah. we chatted alot lahh. hmm. at inter. huiyi and shane was like chiong-ing the bus lah. no at frst i dunno one. then i saw them chiong 69. haha. then me, jinhui and sophia took 225 white plate together. we in the bus also talk talk talk talk. haha. we alighted at the same stop lah. so was like still chatting. haha. i just came home only lah. we chatted like for more than an hr. and oh yes. we were standing and chatting and laughing. then cos at bus stop what will like anytime 225 will just come. so we like counting the buses as we chat you know. and there's about 5 - 6 "disorder" bus. haha. we were like laughing away. haha. then suddenly, got one 225 just stopped as usual. then mrs fong board the bus. i was like looking at the busand stuff. i see see see see, then i see kayan. WOW. that's so qiao. -.- i was like. "wtf!!" and i was like jumping can. not becos i happy lah. but i was kinda paiseh lah. and i shouted "wtf~" so loudly i guess. arghh. paiseh sia. i hope he didn't hear that wtf. cos my reaction very big lahh. DUI BU QI!! haha. i'm sorry. didn't mean to have that reaction. haha. and pls lah. sophia's wanted to sua me lahh. i mean when realy see him. even never see also she sua also good lah. maybe to her. haha. sophia didn't realise he was waving too. hurr. nvm. anyway. i was damn paiseh lah. i was still hoping.. aww.i hope i dun see kayan. hur. i saw him eventually. hur. nvm. after the bus go we still down there chatting lah. haha. jinhui very nice to talk to sia. sophia also lahh. both joker lah. haha. they make really good friends i supposed. haha. oh yes. i realise my posts these days are very long. haha. this is one of them. haha. ok lahh. i end here already.. byebye. blogged @ 6:28 PM Tuesday, January 16, 2007 went to school as usual. ok. i'll never pon school. so i'll be in school everyday. haha. hmm. nth really much to blog about lahh. had assembly then silent reading. assembly was at quadrangle today. cos it's not raining. and today's weather is good. haha. sunny. we had to sing national anthem twice again. what's really annoying is, after the first time we sang the national anthem, mrs tan thinks it's too soft and suggested that we dunno the words to the song. so she wanted all of us to take out our handbooks and look at the lyrics and sing it again. wth! paiseh sia. i have been singing the anthem for like 7 years and counting can? hurr. and i still have to sing it for 3 years more. hurr. i hope this is the first and the last time they are asking us to take out our handbooks. went back to class silent reading. there was reading material today. nice one. it's about the choice you make now will affect what you are in future. woah. the article was good though. nth much happen today. i'm ok today. really. oh whatever. there's assembly for sec3s today.. well. about the same stuff again. about STDs, HIVs, LOVE MATTERS and whatever. ok lah. these things i have heard it many many times already.. but still ok lahh. i still learnt things from it though.. had discussion for the bazaar thigy. and they make me the accountant. WTF~ nvm. hurr. ok lah. stop here for now. go watch tvee. byee. blogged @ 6:30 PM Monday, January 15, 2007 went to school as usual today. had assembly in the hall today. cos first, raining. second, ms susie ho wanna talk to us. ok. maybe i shall i dentify the two ms hos. hmm. i will identify ms ho cin wern as ms ho c.w. and ms suise ho as ms s. ho. omg. cannot cannot. nvm. i'll just identify her as ms ho. and ms ho wanted to talk to us in the hall. about... upcoming events, and elaborate about the new year bazaar. ohhh.. my class is like coming up with food lah. but i already know many many ppl will be selling food. but nvm. they just wanna take the risk. i would even wanna help other ppl... cos i dun see it as a competition. i see it as a time to bond. but classmates dun like me anyway. nvm anyway. we taf students had to stay back after assembly for the principal's addresse. haiyah. everytime also talk about the same thing. sian. oh yes. zhenhao ask me, WHETHER I GOT SPAM LEEWEE's BLOG or WHY I GO SPAM HER BLOG. i can't remember what was his question cos when i hear of it. i get agitated. i just say, "NO. I REALLY DID NOT SPAM HER BLOG. I DIDN'T EVEN TAG IT. WHY DOES EVERYONE THINKS THAT I SPAMMED HER BLOG? DO YOU PEOPLE THINK I'M SO CHILDISH? AND PLS, I DUN SPAM PEOPLE'S BLOG. WHY YOU ALL DON'T BELIEVE ME??!!" i was so agitated that i broke down into tears again,.. it's not i wanted. i dun wanna cry. i just hate it. i hate the fact that i'm ACCUSED of spamming others' blog when i don't have to. SO. PLS. STOP SAYING I SPAM PEOPLE'S BLOG. I DON'T MEANS I DON'T I DON'T USE PEOPLE'S NAME TO SCOLD OTHERS. I DON'T USE KAOPEI NAMES TO SCOLD PEOPLE. WHY DO I HAVE TO DO IT? IF I GO SPAM OTHERS' BLOG, USING OTHER NAMES, I'M A COWARD. I TOLD PEOPLE THEY SPAM OTHERS' NOT PUTTING THEIR OWN NAMES, THEY ARE COWARDS. I'M NOT ONE. I CAN JUST TEKLL YOU KLIKE THAT I'M NOT ONE WHO SPAMS. BELIEVE IT OR NOT, YOU DECIDE. ok. i'm pissed. nvm. i just dun get why ppl always think i'm the one spammin. or rather just this once. whatever. wen back to class at like 0845. then only left 15 min hist lesson finish. arghh. i have two freaking mindmaps to do. and i haven't bath yet. today gor came back from his chalet. first, he lost his phone. second, he and his friends damaged the chalet table. kena burnt. wahalo! stupid lah they all. they bbq ON top of the table lah. i mean i think so. putting the aluminium trays on top of wooden table to bbq of course will kena burnt lah. wtf~ anyway, today was fine. very fine. except for the morning thingy. oh yah. don't misunderstood that i'm still a crybaby. i'm just very pissed off and stressed out by these. and i can just break down anytime. bear with me awhile more k. i'll be back to normal soon. phew~ anyway, there's taf tmr. and i'm going. i mean i'm sick of being a laughing stock to ppl lah. it's either i grow much taller than what i am in now, if not, LOSE WEIGHT. arghh. went to the chem lab during chemistry lah. then it's like the class so noisy.. nvm. it was the last period so we just brought our bags there. went to look for ms ho after telling shihui they all lah. cos i needa put that freaking belt back into gb room. ok nvm. went back to 3E to find wanjing they all. wah. they super entertaining. esp shawn and cheston and their friends. they was singing and singing lah. then suddenly, i remembered tianloke singing at alumni's day last year at ynps. hahah. cos he was there in the class too. haha. and cheukman they all also sang at the alumni's day. aww. memories. shawn and cheston sing soo loud lah! and there's this guy, their friend also lah. he was like violent lah! he take the chair machiam want throw at shawn lah. but it's obviously is play play one lahh. then i suddenly feel that, if i were to be in such a class, aww. how nice. hmm. nvm lah. fated. hmm. went to the dentist with wanjing and shihui. cos wanjing needa dunno do what.. haha. yey! she's getting braces soon!! whee~ haha. oops. hmm. went home after that. use comp. then teng call. ask me go downstairs fetch her. hur. oh yes. she told me she saw kayan. i was like.. "so? kan dao jiu kan dao lor. guan wo she me shi?" haha. ok i'm evil. bleahs. sian-ed. wahlao. when i go down no rain liao lor.. then i go teng house take thing. then when i leave her house, started to rain heavily! wtf~. nvm. lucky got umbrella. hahaha. okok. i rested at the sofa just now. cs i was soo tired lahh. haha. and now i'm blogging and watching tvee. ok. i end here for today. byee. blogged @ 7:34 PM here are the pictues for yesterday. carmen's rubbish... hahaha. her banana candle. "hello? is that mr banana? oh this is carmen calling from banana centre. your phone is here. pls come and claim it within 24hrs. if not is hall eat it..." mr banana left his phone with us.. and this is what happened... "ahhhh... omg... carmen ate the banana phone... aww.. so cruel. see i told mr banana to get his phone in 24 hrs... but he didn't come.. too bad..." nice... =D blogged @ 4:54 PM Sunday, January 14, 2007 thought we'll be like going to east coast. but we didn't eventually. cos raining. wanted to catch a movie. then nv cos alot of show i watch liao. haha. so we just walked round century and tampines mall. ok. that was boring. we took neoprints lahhs. i mean cos we were waiting for mel to just come and meet us.. we was like going from tm to century and from centur to tm. and this continues at least three times.. arghh. i wasn't really feeling great today. so i kinda walked slowly... haha. everything happening so fast that i dun have time to breathe... nvm. anyway. saw derald, chiew liang and bernard lahh. it's been qute some time since i last saw them. i was like, "ehh. chiew liang lehh.." then i saw derald. then i wanted to help teng return him his jacket. but then he say he later in the day going out to orchard then he dun want take. nvm. i just think it's an excuse. nvm. anyway. mel came and we went to have lunch at food junction in century. ok. after mel came, teng and carmen kept disturbing him lahs. so i was like.. ok.. anyway. mel keep saying carmen is fat. -.- hur. hmm. it's really a day. carmen walk to where also will see things she like. hahah. shoping day. that's what teng said lah. went back to tm for dunno what. i forgot.. they went arcade lah. so i waslike outside the arcade. wahlao. siao one lah. they were some house of the dead i think the shoot monster one. then they shoot shoot shoot they shout shout shout. laugh laugh laugh. haiyoh! until i outside can hear..ppl outside also shock dao lah! hahah. after arcading... we go back century i think. ok. i got stm. but i remember everytthing ppl needs. like teng needs a jacket, carmen needs pvc rolls, scotchtape. eric needs a bag. wahahaaa. but of course i won't ghet them all. i no money lah! bleahs. anyway. saw peiyin and rina.. wahhhh. they wear until kinda formal lahh. hur. chatted with them for awhile. or quite awhile lah. then they dunno go where.. we go... omg. i can't remember. but anyway. we didn't do much.. but we just spent the whole day at tampines. haha. saw my cousin, sikuang[sorry i dunno how to spell it...]. yah. i guess he was working lah. he was walking out of metro then i was walking in lah. then we smile.. then we continue to walk. haha. went to take neos again.. then saw chiew liang they all. i mean they were somehere downstairs outside the food court. they went up look for us. but then derald didn't follow. so was like. ask them want take together not. then i was like saying, "you all pay ahh. hahaha." then at last nv take.. bernard say next time. haha. after that, teng very upset. i mean can see lah.. but i dunno what happen. she also dun want tell me. she tell carmen instead i guess. i felt kinda left out. cos it's like. carmen and teng kept talking about their sch stuff. then i also dunno what they talking what. melmel also walk infront one. then like talk to them also no reply de. so i began walking faster. cos i dun wanna be so extra lahh. then they ask me why walk so fast.. oh yes. we walked back to tm. haha. went up to... i can't remember. i saw jeremy, dom, cheng hoong and and and.. i can't remember. hahah. then they was like.. "PAMELA!" i didn't know that until i turned and saw them . haha ok. i'm abit slow lahh. haha. hmm.. carmen saw a pair of shoes she like. then went down quickly to get them lah. then me and teng paid 6 bucks for her. haha. haiyoh. went to buy takopachi. then carmen was like, "ehh i also want eat lehh. but i bo lui liao lehh..." ahha. then at last i treat her $1.20 and mel $1 for her takopachi lah. went to look for alyssa at delifrance. she sa she will be like working until 11 tonight. i was like, "huh?!! 11pm?!! then bu shi every shop close liao then u go home ahh..." then she say, "yahhh..." wahh.. i also want work lehh. bleahs. anyway. she's no longer at pasir ris delifrance. so yah since we at tm so we just went to look for her.. i told them sth... "ehh i tell you all a secret.. men with big bellies normally not fierce one.. normally very nice one. hahaha." no becos i asked alyssa where's her manager.. then i saw the manager also big belly so isaid that big belly man not fierce one. carmen was like, "no lehh. the big belly men i know all very fierce one lehh." hahaa. went home after that. carmen was like playing with the banana candle in the bus. oh yes. she got the banana candles free from some shop when she bought a hairband. haha. then she gave mel one. since he love those stuff. HAHAHA. you get what i mean?? i hope you do. haha. so carmen was playing with hers in the bus. haha. ok. that's cute. hmm. ok. i'll scan the neos soon lah. wait for me ok! tmr i scan i post. hee. haha. okok. i stop here for today. byebye, =) blogged @ 7:00 PM hmm. was supposingly going eastcoast with eric, mel, teng and carmen later. but now eric shen bing le!! he's like down with a flu and a bad cough.. awww. i xin tong lah. =x hahaha. hmm. but seriously. yesterday he still ok one sia.. or maybe he yesterday already sick liao le. haiyur. stupid weather. he better get well mann.... i dun want see him sick lah. bleahs. then he cannot go liao le. then left melmel one guy nia.. aww. soo sad. i was like looking forward to going ecp with them!! hais. nvm. can only pray that he get well soon lahh. wah. this few days raining then my limbs are cold lahh. machiam just come out from aircon room like that. what's more i no more aircon lor. aircon spoil. then no money go buy new one. i'm like living with fan for this few weeks lahs. nvm. fan is good too. haha. hmm i'm meeting carmen they all at 1 later. i dunno if kayan wanna go. if he go, mel won't be alone... haha. wahlaooo... why eric yao shen bing ahh!! f*ck it. kayan dun want go sia. haiyah. i dunno lah. why he keep on LOL one.. say sorry also LOL. everything also LOL. i very irritated lah. i think mel also dun want go already lor. it's like randy dun want. zhenxing cannot. kayan dun want. eric sick. cheukman cannot contact. nelson dun want. WAHLAO. all the ta bors all cannot and dun want. then left melmel nia. we like sooo long nv go out together already lah! i dun understand why they want many many ppl to go out together. 4 also at leaswt got ppl right. dun need everytime give me the "huh?! 4 only ah? so little.. dun want lah. so little ppl." wth. pls lor... last time we 10 ppl like that go out de lor. after watch movie go play basketbal. go eat at 511. awww. i miss those days. 2 years already lor. then now like all not free not free... arghh. i hate it lah. forget.. now only gotta ask melmel if he still wanna go out with 3 gals. haha. well. actually i wanna go east coast becos i just wanna relax. i mean like. before the week start. i just want something peaceful. i even rejected my mum lah. she wanted me to go uncle's house for some buffet thingy lah. she say uncle blanjah at his house. then i say i going out with friends. and i dun wanna go uncle's house... aww. so sian. and jaena they all not going lor. what for i go sia. i go extra nia. i free they not free. i not free they say they want go out cos very sian. it's like everytime like that one lor. omg. i want some peace.... nvm. i'm not letting it go.... i mean i'm still going. i dun care!! =x k lah. update later. bye. blogged @ 10:43 AM Saturday, January 13, 2007 i'm upset. i'm really upset.. i have landed myself into such trouble.. i really didn't want all these to happen. it's all my fault for losing control in class that day nd shouted. to everyone" i'm sorry. i'm very sorry. i really didn't meant these unhappiness. for the rest of the year in 3f, i promise i'll just keep my mouth shut. i dun wanna create anymore trouble. it's enough for me.. i'm tired.. very tired. ppl. trying to help me using my name to scold others, thanks for the thought. but you did the wrong thing. not only you will land me into trouble, you make ppl upset. i dun like scolding others in their tagboards. and i dun do that. i just dun do that. i was scolded. i dun mind. if you ppl thnk by hating me, makes you feel better, by all means hate me.. i'm crying when i type this post. i'm plucking up courage to type this.. it's time for me to put an end. i dun want ppl to be unhappy becos of me. esp ppl around me.. i created way too much trouble for you. i'm sorry. now that the misunderstanding have gone really deep that i seriously dunno how to handle it. i wanted to make it up to it. but now i seriously dunno what to do. i'm crying again. i made others upset.. i thank ppl who care for me. i guess.. i really haveto come to an end in caring for things which beyond my control. life goes on. even if i have to spend my sec3 life very unpleasantly, i will be strong and carry on. i know that it's no use feeling upset. i created this.. i did sth i really shouldn't.. and ppl around me is affected.. what on earth have i donne? why am i in such state that i'm crying silently and i dun want my family to know i'm crying my bro walks in and out. but i really dun want him to see me crying. nic called me. i really dun wish to bring up the matter. it make me very upset. and i have tried to clarify things. i was thinking. where were all my friends ?? they might be reading this pathetc post.. they dun care. "got show watch what. now pam also will be in such a state ahh. she deserve it man. who ask her go make ppl angry. serves her right." ain't that what you are thinking now? i dunno. i won't know what will happen. i dunno why i'm in this state. i needa talk. but who is willing to listen to my cries? my awful cries.. nobody. there's better sounds to hear than hearing mine. my voice is noice pollution... i know that.. thanks ppl. for even spending time to read this.. i'm not attractin attention... i'm just voicing out in my blog.. why am i so foolish? why the hell did i do things that ppl dislike?? it was all over now. i guess. i'll just live with it... blogged @ 10:33 PM wtf. i spent one whole freaking hour to type that post and all gone whern i just saved it as draft. wahlaoo. arsehole. stupid blogger. fucked it. forget it. i shall repost. ahh. had cca openhouse today. woke up at like 0635 this morning. i wore my gb tee and cullottes to sch and brought my gb Uni to sch to change after i've finished doing my stuff. went to sch and saw sophia and zaixuan. chatted with them. i was at sch already by 0800. i needa wrap the venguard boards with the pvc rolls. and i need scotchtapes. so i went to ask the ppl outside even mr chew if they have scotchtape.. then they all dun have. what sia. nvm. so i called ms ho. she said she would be in sch in 10 min. so i waited fo her lahh. sophia was like begging zaixuan to lend her his pe tee. haha. then at last she still borrwed it from jiawei who is also a st john-ian. i went back to the room and waited. went out so many times to chat with sophia they all. hahah. cos very sian lahh. so i asked hadi if my scotchtape is with him. cos i needa use. he say with one of the gals in st john but not in sch yet. hmm. so the gal came lah. i got the scotchtape from her and quickly go wrap my stuff. ms ho came in with projector. then she go get scotchtape for. ehh. nono. that was before i got the scotchtape from the st john gal. ms ho came back again. she say she cannot find scotchtape. arghh nvm. lucky still enough for 3 big venguard boards. m'am peijun came. and she helped me with the wrapping. after wrapping the boards i went to change into my full U. we just simply helped out at the booth. and got ready for the sec1s to come down from the hall and stuff. so we just spent that one whole hour in the canteen. haha. we were walking around lahh. the sec1s came down with their parents. and we were like. trying to pull more ppl to sign up for gb. hmm. we were trying to ask ppl to join gb. and we heard ppl shouting for ppl to join their ccas. so i shouted too. the basketball girls shoutd, "join basketball!!" me and m'am hweeleng shouted, "JOIN GB!!!" hahaha, then we machiam playing bombing game lah. hahha. we shout and shout. until they stopped becos nobody replied. haha, but quite fun lahh. was talking to mr yeo lah. he's so nice. i mean he's a great teacher. in fact, many teachers i know are great. like, ms ho, mrs foo, mdm yong, ms tan both mrs tans, mr tee, mr viknesh, ms poh, mr ganesan and many other teachers. was talking to him about my class.and i asked him for opinions. like erm. ppl say i act infront of teachers to win favour from them. but i seriously did not. why do i have to act nice infront of teachers and make them think that, "oh he's so nice."? i dun have to do that can. i seriously think i dun have the need. i'm just who i am. I AM WHO I AM IN FRONT OF TEACHER AND INFRONT OF ANYBODY. I DON'T ACT TO WIN FAVOUR OR TO GET SOMETHING. THAT'S SO CHEAP. if you really think i would do that, then you seriously dun understand me. read up my report books. all my reports from pri1 until now, see if there's any marks on it. if you say i act, you seriously needa think straight. i only like talking to teachers can. and talking to teachers doesn't mean i'm complaining to them. oh whatever. i shouted becos i was pissed off by the class. and i don'ty think it's a good idea to give bad comments to ppl's ideas. it is a form of respect. i mean you want ppl to respect you, you have to respect others first. and oh yes. i needa make this point. i dun treat ppl as maids nor servants nor slaves. i have no intentions in saying they are servants. sorry if you think i was. but i'm just not. i was just trying to do something. if you still think that way, sory i have explained it is yr prob whether to accept or not. i'm not gonna waste my loud and clear voice to shout for unneccesary stuff again. i will use it for gb, for cheers and for ath. i will make good use of it. and oh yes, there are many many ppl who sincerely cared for me. i have friends and officers of gb, friends from other schools, other classes, church friends, teachers and relatives who cared for me. so i seriousy dun see the need in being upset over ppl who dun care about me. who thinks that i'm useless. i can name all. there's soo many. i'm not showing off butat least i'm proving to you that i still have friends who cre for me. who still love me for who i am now. nd i feel honored to have them in my life. i'm not showing off. i just feel that they might just be the ppl who understand me even more. `huiying `peiting `shane `michelle `ms ho `mr yeo `sophiaZHENG `sophiaCHUA `chuqing `m'am lisha `m'am peijun `m'am hweeleng `m'am jasmine `m'am saihong `eric `teng `wanjing `carmen `shihui `shanrng `pauline `jiaen `jingmin `siyuan `estherLOH `estherFAN `estherSIM `zoey `vincentLEE `kayan `junjie `nelson `melvin `jerlisa `mdm yong `mrs foo `ms tan `mdm luo `kimhong `zhili `jovy `xinhui `yichun `puaysee `annchee `feline `zhiyin `vanessaYEO `vanessaYONG `tricia `dennis `peiyin `belinda `juze `cara `nicholas `shariffah `hafizah `faizah `safirah `rebecca `sarah `yide gorgor `jessica `zhaodan `suling `akhram `adeline `jinghan `zien `qiying `doreenLIM `isabel `huiqi `serene `jansen `justinLEE `justinLEOW `evelyn `mr ali `ms loke `mr tan `ms ong `mrs singh `xinyi `iris `sheauyun `sansan `mr viknesh `mr tee `mr lee [tuition teacher] `weihan `edwin `qiurong `mingkang dao shi `yinhuan dao shi `wenguang dao shi `suqing dao shi `mrs jan yap `mrs yap [student care aunty] `ms lim `mr jhee `mrs tay `daniel `dad + mum `aunties and uncles and soo many ppl who cared for me. there's more. there's so many ppl who cared for me. i felt the care. i really do. they were the ppl who really cared for me. and encouraged me. i'm gonna get over all the obstacles god planted in in my life. i'm gonna study hard, acheive my goal. i wanna prove to you that i'm not easy. i'm not gonna give up to let you think i'm useless. i dun wanna be a loser in your eyes. life goes on without you ppl. cleared up and went back to gb room for a short meeting. tim and edward came to our room to sort of entertain us lah. so they are like telling us to response to their OI cheer. so we also entertain them lah. haha. lucky my voice was loud to help gb.. hee. haha. it was fun lah. seriously. yeps. had vesper after that. then we went to change out our full Uni. and went home after that. i was so tired i came home, napped for an hour. did my tuition hw and went for tuition. and here i am blogging now. today's post is a really long one. take your time to read it. and oh yes. i wanna clarify some things. first, i did not spread that YOU spammed my blog. i merely just told one person or two. second, i didn't go to YOUR tagboard to scold YOU. i won't do such a thing. third, YOU have too many misunderstanding towards me. and YOU dun wanna listen. so i think i really have nth more to say. oh yes. now ppl are thinking that i tagge YOUR board to scold YOU. wth. anything. if you all believe i did that, think again. when i did i do such a thing before? i think its time for me to stop here. bye. blogged @ 6:40 PM Friday, January 12, 2007 wahh. i'm so tired today. that i seriously dun feel like blogging. i must be strong in my class. i must not care of the jeers. i'll just do my part. pls. my classmates suck. anyway. a short post for now. i went to school as usual. but becos i had too many things to bring to sch, so i sit papa's lorry to school.. went back to class to put my bag down, rushed down to the office to find ms ho, get key for gb room and noticeboard. i put everything in gb rom, went to get a bottle of mineral water. and went back to class. we had anthem, announcement and stuff. we had a discussion on some new year bazaar thingy. we were supposed to discuss in groups what we want come up for our class booth. my group all malay boys. only me and sharon. mrs tay ask us go some ppl's group. they straight away say, "dun want!!!" oh pls. who wanna be with them lah. f*cking idiots. nvm. we went to join safirah instead. they all waned food lah. but becos i know what's going on. i know confirm will alot of food one. i know most classes will just choose food as their theme. i suggested doing accessories. well, i was just hoping that if we can make them together, i might be better with my classmates. i realy want better relationship with my classmates. but i guess they misunderstand my meaning. i was reluctant to present. but i did still. some ppl's ideas wasn't very good either. but i seriously have no idea why they have SO MUCH comments on my presentation. or rather my grp's suggestion. SOME PEOPLE simply think their idea is so good they said my idea was, "confirm nobody will go one lor." i respect you you respect me. as simple as that. i didn't comment on yr idea, i rather you comment something better. dun talk rubbish. nobody will go yr stall either. don't think you are so great. i doubt anyone wil even see what your seeling. maybe yes, kids. kids will. or maybe some others wll. they will get sick of yr food. they won't come back. ok i ahte comment on others' ideas. you forced me to do so. i seriously find no reason in fighting with CHILDISH people. yes. they made me cry. i promise, i'm gonna be brave and overcome the obstacles. and oh yes. some CHILDISH ppl tagged my blog. scroll down at my tagboard. i dun see any need to reply. but i did anyway. cosi know who the person might be. she is a girl. a girl sitting on the second row. she's a chinese. i'm kinda sure. but i have no proof. forget it. i'm not gonna say "wah. cher you know right got some CHILDISH people go tag my blog last night sia." oh whatever. to whoever hates me, write yr name lah. i dun mind seeing yr name there. it's just that it will pollute my tagboard. that simple. i can spend the freaking time checking who was it. and now i seriously know who is it. very very sure of it. ok. i'm proud. i'm whatever. you dun like me, get lost lah. you can tell the whole world you hates me now, you can do anything to me, but i suggest you look in the mirror. yes, you will ask me to look in the mirror MYSELF. but i have to finish whatever i wanna say. yes, i shouted. no use. nvm. at least i tried to help. yes, you will say help, yue bang yue mang lah. whatever. you ppl dun like me? i have friends who truly understand why i did so. yes, i'm mad woman, i'm someone whom everybody hates, everybody detests. i seriously dunno my purpose here in this sch. i feel so unhappy. my heart breaks. i'm crying silently. i seriously need someone to talk to.. went gb room after sch to open up the door and do some stuff. we had to finish everything by today. and it's like. i'm soo tired now.. i no mood blog already. bye. blogged @ 10:02 PM Thursday, January 11, 2007 argh. my life as a squat leader very xin ku sia. i have soo many things to do!! and everything have to be done by saturday!! why?!!! i have like 2 more big boards to complete. i guess i have to burn midnight oil tonight liao lor. i still have my assignments to complete... and it's raining every now and then.. i seriously dun feel like ding the things but i have to. arghh. ha. i scolded my class today. but i hate the response... nono. first i shouted at them. i shout until 3E and 3G can hear me. not very clear though. they were like, eh pam why you shout sia? i mean like during recess lah. when i go out of my class and go back to class they were like telling me they can hear me. shit lah. so paiseh. nvm. my voice dun need shout also very loud one. anyway. i shouted at them becos of the following reasons.. [1] they laugh at teacher [2] they dun show respect for teacher [3] they very very noisy [4] they think it's very funny to sing happy birthday to teacher when it was meant to be a joke and when teacher come in. [5] i super pissed off by their attitude towards studying. they seriously dunno what the word RESPECT means. must wait until mrs tan to come and scold then know how to keep their ass shut. but pls, that didn't end. they jeer at me ok. i guess they are just jealous that i can be so loud. HAHA. very irritating on lor. make teacher angry nia. A.S sia. ATTENTION SEEKER. they seriously dun deserve to be in a better class,. they should just stay in a not so good class then. okok. lets not talk about my class. it's like i'm freaking tired to do so.. i have better things to do lah. oh yes, today teacher had photo taking. i wonder when will be our turn can.. hurr. hmm. my bro have gone for his chalet. i might need some rest first before i continue doing my stuff. i'm freaking tired and still yawning lahh. omg... i have maths, i have physics for homework. great. sec3.. not enough sleep lahh. and recently, i'm promoted to be TIDALWAVE HOUSE CAPTAIN lahh. i seriously think i should ask ryan what to do in this post. hahaha. okok. sian-ed.. went to gb room after sch today to find jinghan.. got some stuff. went to take 87 to inter with sophia. i went under the rain can. and it's like soo heavy can the rain. so heavy until the roads machiam flooding already lor. then some more got fountain ahh. stairs fountain. HAHA. cos it's like come down what all the water. haha. went to meet m'am lisha to do some stuff. huiying didn't come with us eventually. she stayed in sch to help the rest. i wonder how they are doing. hmm. i hope they will stay back with me to do the boards. cos there's too much for me to do alone. i sseriously need help. oh myy. sat wear full Uni sia. sian lah. nvm. me and m'am lisha finished one board except for the captions and stuff. the two other boards i've gotta bring all of them to sch tmr. so that i can complete hem in sch lahh. and that i doesn't needa bring it home mah.. pathetic can. nvm. at least m'am lisha helped me lahh. ok. i stop here for now.. i go rest awhile first.. later then do my stuff.byee. blogged @ 6:30 PM Wednesday, January 10, 2007 ok. i finally finished my maths and zuo wen. oh my. i got a cloze passage to finish. but actually i dunno how to do. HAHAHA. now is 2312 hrs. so it's like. i guess for the next 365-10=355 days i will be spending my night doing homework. or maybe err.. 355-14-30-7-60=.... i dunno. oh whatever.ok lah. i gotta sleep. have sch tmr lahh... ohhh how sian can. okok. really gtg. haha. byee. nights. =D blogged @ 11:15 PM sch was good today. just that wanjing was kinda angry and not in the mood today. then didn't really talk to her. cos i know my fault mahh. yeps. i am freaked off by some idiots in my class today. laughing at teacher just becos teacher is not so tall. and pls lah that idiot is shorter than teacher can. say teacher short. wahlao. ownself everything also dun want bring still dare say ppl. not i dun want talk to you sia. is i seriously can't stand talking to you ppl. only know how to eat in class, laugh at teacher, laugh at ppl who kena bullied. and whatever lah. laugh laugh laugh very funny mehh. laugh at yourself lahh. both also not committed to cca.. no wonder some ppl can't get what they want lahh. come POA class still down there dun want work hard. play play play. pls lor. you dun want study, you dun want pass sec3, you dun want skip N levels other ppl want can. dun only think about yourself lahh. think about other ppl who wann get good grades lahh. i dun wanna be in the same class as you next year until sec5 lahh. very sick lahh. same class with you machiam same class with some idiots can. dun waste your time if you dun wanna study.. dun waste yr money lah. come sch nv bring book. or rather one book also nv buy lor. waste ppl time nia. go home sleep lah since you like to sleep soo much. everytime oversleep for everything. anything lah. i very sure you won't do your homework also. only know how to waste ppl time. ppl money also haven't return. my construction set also haven't return. ok. i'll return yr vcds and yr book to you real soon. i dun wanna owe anybody anything. phew. you know what. my msn nick is, "i'm S.A.Y. S=SINGLE. A=AVAILABLE. Y=YOUNG." woah. i thought of it one you know. hahaha. went home after sch.. saw this really cute sec1. he's sooo cute!! he refused to tell me his name. but can see he very guai lah. i mean guai as in like he listens lahh. soo cute. next time confirm very handsome one. hahah. hmm. was waiting for 225 white plate. then i saw randy, zhenxing and munchin. randy soo cute!! especially with his long pants!!! awww. later let you see. hee. i tou pai one. so damn cute lahh. haiyur.then he walk beside zhenxing machiam his younger brother lor... like gorgor and didi lor. soo cute.. arghh. ohh great. my bro's class chalet is like tmr?!! so fast can. but he did a last min calling last night. haha. ehh. sunday going east coast.. but then dunno wo want go sia.. sunday lehh!! haiyoh. sian sia. nvm. sure got ppl go one... hahha. oh yes. before i alight, mrs ong called me.. then she ask me if i'm able to be house captain.. i was like. OMG.. me?!! house captain??!! can or not? i scared sia.. wahlao. its like hundred over ppl under me lahh. then i dunno what does the captain do. hahhaa. i guess it will be fun lah. bleahs. haha. i'm so surprised. i thought i'll just be an upper sec house leader can. never did i expect myself to become house captain lahh. arghh. thanks ahh shariffah told me i would become house captain when i go sec3 lah. then i really become house captain... wahhh... nvm. i'll do my best for tidalwave... =D hahah. cute right?!!! hahaha. =x haha. ok lah. end here for today. byee. blogged @ 3:45 PM Tuesday, January 9, 2007 went to school as usual. went watching death note 2 with peiting, huiying, jovy and xinhui. haha. yichun went along but got tuition s nv go watch with us..went to have lunch at tech view first.. quite fun lah. took 15 to tm. yichun and i go get the tickets first. the rest go shop around then meet them 1515 outside cinema. hurr. hmm. wah. alot of students sia. actually not alot lah. but still ok lah. death note2 nice sia.. L so cute sia. bleahs. wahlao. so cold in the cinema sia.. sian. but death note2 is nice. hahah. L is very very cute. lalala. haha. hmm. we watched the 1530 show. the show ended at 6 odd. reached home not long ago. haha. going bath soon. haa. nth much to blog about today lahh. end here. byee. blogged @ 7:18 PM